Bill Burr Digs Into Comedians’ Stories About Fistfights, Drunk-Driving Arrests & More – The Ringers


– You were a borderline
street person. – Yeah!
– This is the stories like. – Yeah. (laughs) – Hacks live forever.
– Yeah. (laughs) Seriously, hacks live forever,
bad people live forever. – Yeah they do,
are you doing that, was gonna say tantric,
what the fuck was that meditation?
– I do tantric meditation. Yeah, it’s where I have an orgasm for four hours
– It stinks. while I’m meditating,
it’s just ugh. (soft upbeat music) – You know, I’m interviewing
all these comics, and I gotta say like
your background is everywhere from going
to Kenny Bunk Port to having a fistfight
in a casino in Tahoe, so like what happened?
– Yeah, yeah. (laughs) – It sounded like you
were born into like– – I fucked up.
– You did. – I did, I really
fucked up, I well– – Well, wait let’s wait, okay. Is Rosebud your real name? – No.
– No, it’s nickname, okay. – Yeah, yeah I mean
I was called Rosebud. I was actually called
Bud, like a truck driver. – Oh, okay.
– From the time I was like a toddler until college, and then I was
like, well, Rosebud because my name is Rosemary. So I was like–
– Oh, okay, – Rosebud is more feminine and then, but I’d already
developed a personality around the name bud. – Right,
– So it doesn’t– – Well, how did it go? Like
you were in like your dad was Secretary of State. – No, no, no, my grandfather
was Secretary of State under George Bush Sr, and my whole dad’s side of the family is like
just a Game of Thrones kind of mentality, you know? And then my mom is like a
painter who lives in Maine and just like, like
no man in her life. Like divorced my dad. Started campaigning for Obama
and it was like a whole– – Bad divorce.
– Yeah, yeah, they don’t talk. – She went spiteful there, okay. – Right. Right. – So then you went with her. – I did, I sided with her
but now that I’m older, I’m realizing that
every thing that’s funny about me comes from my dad. – Is that right?
– Yeah. – You know what’s funny, ’cause
I realize like my dad was so volatile and
everything like that, I thought I got so
much of my sense of humor from him.
– Yeah. – I think I just got a
lot of jokes from him. – Yeah. – But my mother is
really like stealth. Yeah, she’ll take
you out at the knees before you even realize that
your head’s hitting the floor. – You know what? My mom left my
apartment this weekend. Like, she had helped me move in and she said to me
right before she left she pulled something like that. She looked at me and
was like, you know, I know that you do comedy but
you don’t have to be comedy, and I just, I was
like what the fuck? Like really. – Yeah, but that’s great advice. – It fucked with me. It was such good advice that
I was like, ow, you know? – No, but I know
exactly what she means ’cause I always hated that like when I had like guy roommates. It’s like we don’t have
to be the stereotypical– – All the time.
guys with the pizza in the fucking seat cushion. Can we just do the dishes and
maybe live like human beings. – Yeah. – So tell me about this
fight in a Tahoe casino. I mean, I feel like you’ve
really seen America. – Yeah, I have.
– You saw the Bush’s summer home. Got in a fight in
a casino in Tahoe. What is left? – Yeah, I mean, I’ve
been all over the place. I was, you know, I
would tell you the story if I remembered it fully. I was blacked out
for most of it so. – Oh, that’s right,
you kind of– – I was drinking at the time. – You were drinking
back in the day. – Yeah, yeah, so I don’t
drink anymore but I was, at the time I was at a wedding
and I haven’t been invited to a wedding in a long time. But I went to this wedding, and it was my ex-boyfriend’s
friend and we were in a casino. You know they pump
them full of oxygen, so you’re drinking
but you’re awake. – Right. – And, I don’t remember what I– – You’re still blaming
casino on this one. – Yeah. (laughs) That’s a good point. – You’re putting a little
bit on them, all right. – Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I
was, God I didn’t even realize that until you said that. I, yeah, I just like,
he said something, I don’t know what it was
but he said something, and I just fucking hauled off, and when I looked at him he
was bleeding and I was like, oh I didn’t realize that
I could punch someone. – Oh wow, you like. – I really just–
– You messed him up. – I messed him up, yeah. – So what happened,
did you get thrown out? – No, all I remember is– – Hilarious, you guys
never get kicked out? – No, there’s no bottom.
– Where you can literally do anything.
– No white women can do, literally there’s nothing,
the net will always catch you. – Did they kick him out for
bleeding on the casino rug? – (laughs) Yeah they’re
like you’re making a mess. It was like, all I remember
is him like running through the street and me
like running after him. – This always blows my mind
coming from like one sport. You know, one team in
each sport, you know? It’s like would you
guys have the option to be the Mets or the
Yankees and the Yankees won all those titles, how’d the
hell you become a Mets fan? – Well, I’m from
Queens unfortunately
and also fortunately. (laughs) So, yeah, I just
grew up working class and just rooting for the
working man’s id, basically. – Yeah, no it takes a lot
of heart to be a Mets fan. Did you ever get mad
at like your relatives like you couldn’t
pick the Yankees, so I could have a
little more joy in life? – Yeah, I actually picked the
Yankees first when I was a kid and then the Mets, like I
guess, they were just closer. – You got sucked into that huh? – I got sucked in. I got guilted for wanting to
be with the winners, you know? – Well, what year did you, were
you rooting for the Yankees? – 96 through 2000. – Well, there you go. – When they won and but in 2000 when the Mets got
in the World Series I was like, I guess
I’ll root for the Mets. – Critical, critical mistake.
– Yeah, I know. – That’s how you
become a comedian. – [Jordan] Yeah, basically. – So you mentioned
before, like, family life which is what I love
about a lot of comics when they talk
about their family. And I feel like I’m
hearing something real and I’m getting to know them. Your grandfather had a.

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